Stop Judging! A Challenge in Looking at Your Own Life



Stop Judging

How many times do you judge other women? How many times do you think negative or critical thoughts of others? It’s so easy to quickly think of criticism. From the mom with the screaming kid in the store, to the mom you overhear won’t let her kids read anything but non-fiction, to the “I can’t believe she wore that or let her child out of the house like that.” We are so hard on each other.

How many times have you said to yourself, “If I had her money or smarts or looks, then I could do that or be that way as well?” If I thought I was alone, I would keep my thoughts to myself, just out of pure shame, but I have a feeling I am not alone. We have enough troubles without worrying about everybody else’s life.

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” — Ian MacLaren

I know you guys have been watching the Olympics, right? Well, did you see this picture of Michael Phelps?


Phelps is looking straight ahead, focused on winning. Meanwhile the competitor at the top of the screen is comparing himself to Phelps. Phelps won the gold for this event (no surprise), and the other swimmer? Well, he didn’t even medal.

This is how I want to live my life. I don’t want to miss my own victories because I was comparing my life to the girl next door.

“Comparison is the thief of joy.” — Theodore Roosevelt

Don’t miss what is right in front of you. Don’t miss the moments with your family and your friends. Don’t miss your baby’s first steps or his first smile. Don’t miss the moment your teenager feels like talking. Don’t miss your niece scoring the only goal in the soccer game. Don’t look around or you may miss all the good moments in your own life. One day you  will look back on your life and realize those moments are gone.

I don’t have the biggest house. I don’t have tons of money in the bank. I don’t have the newest car or the most fashionable clothes. My three year old daughter does often look like she just got out of bed. (She will not let me fix her hair!) And sometimes, I am the mom with the screaming kid. We all have bad days. We all have good days. I don’t know about you, but I don’t need to look around to know that I have it pretty good.

Instead of judging the mom who looks like she has it all together or the one who doesn’t, let’s focus on what we do have. Every time you start to think a negative or critical thought, I challenge you to STOP, focus on what is good in your life and don’t waste your energy. It is a waste of energy, after all. What good does it do anybody when you are thinking critical thoughts? It doesn’t help you and it certainly doesn’t help the women you are judging.

“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive — to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.” — Marcus Aurelius