It’s the fourth trimester, you know, like the fourth quarter in the game. You’re on the edge of your seat wondering if you can make it another sleepless night. Or like winter and its long days that just blend together.
This season is hard.
There are lots of tears — LOTS — from everyone. There are lots of yawns and endless cups of coffee poured. Of course, it’s all worth it with those newborn snuggles, sweet coos, and heart melting toothless smiles.
But it’s hard, y’all.
It’s overwhelming some days. My anxiety goes through the roof trying to juggle toddler independence, household explosions, and endless baby cries. To top it all off, I don’t recognize myself. None of my clothes fit. My skin is stretched. My eyes are worn.
Self-care is doing the basics like brushing my teeth. And I have gone a day where I didn’t realize I hadn’t brushed my teeth until I went to bed. My alone time is my bath time. A really, really quick bath.
My Google search is filled with “Is this normal?” I feel lonely. I didn’t expect to feel lonely this time, but I do. My husband’s routine resumed to normal. It seemed like his routine barely flinched. I know it’s changed for him too, but as a SAHM my whole world has changed.
Those were my thoughts during the fourth trimester.
I can now tell y’all, I made it through the fourth trimester. It’s still not easy, but our days are better. Most days I feel like “I’ve got this.” Other days, I say “nope” and put everyone back into their car seats and we go home. I remember a friend telling me there will be days like that while pregnant with baby #2.
While looking from my toddler to my newborn, I knew these days would not last. My newborn will be a toddler before I know it. Each day, I (try to) seek out the love and beauty in our days — you know — in between all the mess and tantrums. Recently, I did my best to find the humor in my toddler FINALLY being interested in potty training the week after her brother was born and the joy in struggling to embrace both kids at once. (See the picture above. I usually held my newborn while my toddler snuggled against my legs. Anyone else have to do this?)
In all those long days that I thought I was losing myself, I wasn’t. I was just in the chaos of growing into a mom with more kids. It’s just a season y’all, and I’m now a seasoned mom of two.
What were your thoughts during the fourth trimester? Let me and other mamas know how you survived in the comments!