It’s back to school time. Fresh haircuts, new (read: unstained) outfits, shiny shoes, dreams of your children looking neat and put together. Sadly, this only lasts about five minutes before you realize you don’t live in fantasy Stepford children dream land. Between growing a child in utero and this maniac toddler, I do well to shower once a week, start the day with (intentions of) a matching outfit for my child, and keep the house from burning down. A quick query of the other CMB contributors shows I’m definitely in good company at least.
I’ve come up with a few quick guidelines for those of you entering the *super fun* ((sarcasm font)) stage of “I dress myself!” Enjoy commiserating with us!
- Wearing underwear or a diaper: Yes…usually. Three exceptions: 1) potty training, the run around naked stage; 2) you’re looking for something to do, so you sit and wait for a mess to happen so you can clean it; and 3) you’re too tired to care.
- Wearing mom’s underwear: hard NO. Experimentation is natural, but let’s be honest, you know they’re going to hide one of these new and fantastical accessories and bust it out at the most inappropriate times. Family visiting from out of town? Packing his back pack for the first day at a new school? Seems like the perfect time to wear my new favorite “hat,” right mom? Do yourself a favor and nip that one in the bud from the start.
- Accessorizing: obviously. The key to any good outfit is a good accessory. Sure we’d love for them to choose precious (seasonably appropriate) hats or a simple (read: not princess-themed) necklace, but this never happens. No, we choose to wear mittens and toboggans in the dead of summer, or the giant singing Sophia amulet instead. Kids love choices though, and if you let them choose their outfits’ accessories you *might* get them out of the house with all appropriate body parts covered and TWO shoes on.
- Shoes: yes, but number and whether or not they match–up for debate. As a nurse, the thought of leaving the house without shoes is one of the grossest things I can imagine. As a mother, I frequently take what I can get. Lately I can get one shoe (almost always on the left foot only). You win some, you lose some, am I right?
- Appropriate body parts all covered in matching attire: GOOD LUCK. Unicorn of toddler fashion. If your precious toddler is still allowing you to make all the fashion decisions, relish it, mama, because it will not last long.