Food and I have a long and complicated history.
I wasn’t a picky child, and I’ve always happily eaten most vegetables. I remember being the kid at McDonald’s who ordered a chef salad instead of a Happy Meal and fed my little sister the hard-boiled egg yolks that I didn’t like. I also liked eating too much for comfort, and after moving to Virginia from Indiana when I was in third grade, I put on enough weight to be a chubby kid. I’ve struggled with my weight since that time.
I wonder sometimes if women who don’t struggle with their own bodies (do they exist??) have an easier time feeding their kids. Maybe they don’t worry when their kid eats a sleeve of crackers instead of a healthier snack. But I’ve always been kind of uptight about what my kids eat, while desperately trying not to preach to them about food. I do my best to provide healthy options while not totally depriving them of sweets.
And yet none of my kids voluntarily eats vegetables, unless it’s my toddler stealing my lunch. (If I put it on her plate, NO WAY, but anything off my plate is delicious.)
I’ve gone through phases, as one does, in 10 1/2 years of parenting and four children. I have periods where I try not to care about vegetables, because they do eat fruits. I sometimes hand out vitamins and supplements. I occasionally try to be mean, continually sending back the same four carrot sticks in a lunchbox until they disappear (probably into a friend’s stomach or the trash can).
And then we get to where I currently am, which is full-on Deceptively Delicious.
Do you know about Deceptively Delicious? In 2008 (ironically, weeks before my first child was born), Jessica Seinfeld’s first cookbook was released, detailing how to make vegetables purees to hide in recipes ranging from muffins, brownies, and cookies to meatloaf, spaghetti, and chicken tenders. It was a #1 New York Times bestseller, and many of the moms I knew were doing the purees thing. At the time, I was so against the idea. Hide the nutritious food?! Certainly my own child would be eating roasted beets and goat cheese salad by the time she was two! All the books said I had to do was keep feeding her good foods and she would learn to like them eventually.
Fast forward to that child as a 10-year-old, and I can say…she’s better. A little. She no longer gags and throws up trying to eat a green bean and can occasionally make herself eat a baby carrot or some spinach. But her sensory eating issues led to a lot of battles and left me clueless. For a period of about six months when she was a young toddler, she only ate bananas, applesauce, and bread. None of my other kids have been quite as resistant, but they aren’t accommodating of new and exciting foods on their plates, either.
I’ve arrived at the dark side, where we steam and puree the heck out of some squash and hide it in meatballs. And you know what? I don’t even care. It makes life easier for me and for them. I try not to lie to my kids (about food or anything), but I’m not lying when I tell them we’re having Spaghetti and Meatballs for dinner. I just don’t mention the squash in the meatballs and carrot in the sauce. I’ve long been known for adding anything and everything to smoothies and freezing them into popsicles. They don’t ask. I don’t tell.
So I’m tricking my kids into eating more vegetables and it’s giving me sanity. And being sane is my number one priority as a mom.
