When I looked at the calendar and saw that my next post would be published on Valentine’s Day, it took a moment for me to dislodge my eyeballs from my brain after rolling them SO HARD.
I’m not romantic.
Ever the practical gal, my idea of being swept off my feet is being let off the hook for bedtime duty, coming home to the dishes being washed, or hearing the greatest words ever said: “I’m taking the kids out for a few hours.”
Despite being decidedly unromantic, this happily-married-for-17-years gal does have some advice for those of you stressing about the mother of all date nights. It seems that everyone is telling us that date night is absolutely necessary for a healthy marriage. You HAVE to date your spouse. You simply MUST spring for a babysitter and go out for a bit every week/month/whatever because divorce. The interwebz tell us this is true.
So when we moved hours away from family and date night suddenly started costing as much as our rent each month, my hubs and I had to stop. No more sitters. No more nights out. If you ask anyone on the internet or in your local moms group, we’ve killed our marriage and might as well sign the divorce papers.
I call BS.
Truth be told, even if we could spring for a babysitter and go out to dinner, we’re too tired. The last thing my cute husband and I want to do is shower, get dressed, and leave the house. Granted, we are the people who took our children with us on our tenth anniversary date because “it would be so much more fun if they come with us!”
I am here to tell you that date night doesn’t have to be dinner and a movie. It doesn’t have to be paying a sitter so you can go out once a month (or even on Valentine’s Day).
Date night can be getting the kids in bed early (or, let’s be honest, letting them sleep in the living room with the tv on) so you and your spouse can turn in and watch tv together. Date night can be sneaking off to a quiet room, sharing a pint of ice cream, and making bets on how long it will be before the kids find you. Date night can be text messages across the room, picking up a surprise latte on the way home, or sitting on the porch for a few minutes watching the sunset. Date night doesn’t have to be complicated. Date night doesn’t have to be a date night at all.
Don’t feel like a failure because life doesn’t allow you nights out with your love. Send your sweetie a goofy meme, grab that cutie a coffee, or, if you’re married to me, clean the kitchen. Date night: done.
