Ashley
School Lunch Boxes for Dummies
Every day of elementary school, my lunch box contained the following:
a peanut butter sandwich on white bread
a Jello pudding cup
two cookies (Chips Ahoy or Dunkaroos, preferably)
a handful of Pringles...
Mom’s Summer Reading List
Recently, I've realized that I'm happiest when I have a book to read. Like basically every other human being under the age of 70, I have a crippling addiction to my phone. A few...
To Redshirt or Not: A Total Mind#@*&
You may have read that title and are thinking 'Good God, not another post about redshirting, I can't take it!’ Well, consider yourself #blessed; opt out of this one and go watch videos of...
Learning Not to Hate Mother’s Day
There’s no better place on Earth to watch the passing of time than the dollar bin at Target. As soon as one holiday is over, its shelves are filled with a new assortment of...
Meatless Mondays: Veggie Chili with Homemade Tortilla Chips and Portobello Mushroom Cheeseburgers with Crispy...
When I was growing up, the only times I ever consumed a 'meatless' meal was by accident, like cheese pizza or peanut butter sandwiches or that time I ate half a can of chocolate frosting...
Nothing in My Life is Nice… And That’s Okay
Sometimes, I look around at my life. My house, my kids, my husband. My face. I look at all of these things and I think 'Good God. We all look like straight-up garbage. Is...
Lessons from an Unexpected NICU Stay
Wh-whump. Wh-whump. Wh-whump.
The rhythmic beat of my breast pump cuts through the quiet as I grip the bottles and try to stay awake. I'm huddled under a blanket in the dark, while the rest...
Dear Dog, Sorry We Hate You
Dear Lola,
Let's just get this out of the way: you're a dog. And on top of that, you're pretty stupid. The other night I asked your dad if he thought you were just somehow...
“Any Day Now, Huh?” and Other Annoying Things People Say to Pregnant Ladies
As I approach the end of my third pregnancy, the bombardment of annoying and startling comments I receive daily from strangers has become more constant. Last month I talked about gender expectations and how...
Stories of Love: Long Distance Runaround
Ten years ago, when I was 20, I traveled overseas for the first time to study abroad in London. I chose London because I love the Rolling Stones and I'm too dumb to learn...