It was maybe 10 years ago, when I was just 30 and had but a few silver strands shining through, that I asked on Facebook what other women thought about gray hair:
- Go gentle into that good night?
- Or rage, rage against it and dye?
I’m pretty certain back then I had a variety of answers. But I do remember a lot of “You’re way too young to go gray!” comments.
In the last 10 years, I feel like I’ve aged a LOT.
I’ve had two more children, lived with high schoolers on Baylor campus that whole time, struggled through back problems, had my weight fluctuate. As I flip to a new decade this week, I am well aware of just how much of my hair is silver now.
And you know what? I’m pretty okay with it.
As women we are told to be so many things: thin, fit, sexy, big-busted, sweet, shy, and of course we should look the same as we did at 20 for the rest of our lives, hair color included.
I’m not sure I realized when I was a child that women do get gray hair as they get older, because I sure didn’t know any women in their 40s choosing that path. I once heard my aunt say, “He said he married a brunette and wants it to stay that way.”
I won’t go into how enraged that made me and how I wish she would fight back and say she didn’t marry a bald man…
But I will say this. I think it should be your choice. If you identify as a blonde and want to keep it that way, you go ahead. But don’t let it be because anyone else made you feel like you had to.
I’m choosing to go gentle into the good night of old[er] age. Why?
- I am cheap and I don’t want to pay to get my hair dyed every six weeks. Right now my schedule is getting my hair cut about every two years.
- Which brings me to the fact that I am just bad about being high maintenance. If I can manage to wash and moisturize my face, I am doing pretty good.
- I feel like it’s a little push-back against the patriarchy and the absolutely insane expectations our society holds for women.
Men are allowed to go gray. It’s distinguished and refined. No one ever questions their choice there. So why should I not be “allowed”?
I’m allowing myself.
