The Moment I Lost My “Cool” Card

I remember the day fondly. It was one of those “realization” days, with moments that make you realize just how old you are. It happened one Thursday a couple weeks ago; I was in the car with my two (step)daughters, and we were listening to the radio when my jam came on the radio. Yes, ladies, Justin Timberlake came on the radio, and I was singing “Can’t Stop the Feeling” at the top of my lungs and dancing (remember, dancing burns calories)! Then, as the song came to an end, I told my girls how much I wish NSYNC* would have a reunion. That is when the “moment” occurred, as they both looked at me and said, “Who is NSYNC*?”

I knew then I had officially lost my “cool card.”

Not that I am saying I was ever “cool,” but I did think I was kind of cool growing up. I always knew the “fads,” and I kept up with what was “in.” However, my daughters have recently proved to me that I have no idea WHAT is going on any more. I am officially no longer cool. All coolness has gone out the window, and I am now the “mom” who just doesn’t get it.

Even as a stepmom, I thought I would be good at relating to my daughters. But, I have no idea what they are talking about half the time. When they text me, I almost always text back, “Huh?” Yes I am an English Writing major, but even before I decided on this major, I always used sentences. However, EVERYTHING is shortened now. Is it really hard to write, “Have a nice day?” Because now it is “HAND.” So, when I was texted that, I thought something was going on with one of their hands. I am just completely out of it. And that is just the start when it comes to their slang. “OIC” is apparently, “Oh, I see.” “TBH” stands for “To be honest,” which, by the way (“BTW”), I thought stood for “Throw Back Holiday,” because of all these “Throw Back Thursdays.” Therefore, even when I think I am “cool” and know what my daughters are texting me, I have absolutely NO clue!

And the “lack of coolness” isn’t just in regard to songs on the radio or texting. Oh, no. It also goes for rules in the home. Growing up, I was always saying, “When I have a child, I am going to let them do this and that.” HAHAHAHAHAHA. (Which, BTW, is laughing — LOL, or laughing out loud. See, I am trying to get better!)

Aren’t we all, as moms, just eating our words by the minute?

I turn more into my mom each and every day. And, you know what? I am okay with that. I am realizing that I am not supposed to be my child’s “friend” right now, which is what I thought I wanted to be growing up. I just want to keep them safe and help prevent them from making the same mistakes I made. I want to let them spread their wings, but within certain boundaries. Of course, because I am not “the friend,” I get to hear, “but so-and-so’s mom lets her/him.” Apparently I am the ONLY parent who has rules. Are there any other “rule” parents out there? Because, I want you to know that YOU are not the only one, especially if your child is trying to tell you otherwise.

But you know what I will never lose? My “coolness” might fade, but my love for them will always be there.

I think I love them more and more each and every day. Don’t get me wrong: We have moments (don’t we all?), and step-parenting is NOT easy. (Now that I have my son, I can say for a fact that step-parenting is harder than parenting.) But, I truly love my girls as if they were my own. I only want what is best for them, and while I might annoy them with my chore lists, schedules, the need to always have them check-in with me, etc., I only do it because I love them, I want to keep them safe, and I want them to grow into strong, independent women. And if that means losing my “cool card,” then here you go! The “cool card” is now out the window!